border
sSNAKESs : Reptile Forum
 

Go Back   sSNAKESs : Reptile Forum > Community Forums > General Discussion

Notices

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-27-02, 08:36 PM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 
SilverTongue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: ClearLake, Texas
Age: 44
Posts: 1,185
Send a message via Yahoo to SilverTongue
Talking Why God Created Children

WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they
are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take
comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did
not extend to his own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve,
and the first thing he said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit?

Hey Eve...we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes, way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.

"Why?"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied,
wondering why he hadn't stopped creation after making the
elephants.

A few minutes later, God saw his children having an apple
break and he was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was
that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus
the pattern was set and it has never changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!


If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children
wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think
it would be a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching
them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen
telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own
children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their
young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually
repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind
yourself that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We child proofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY!

Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home.

************************************************** ***********

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION
AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:
"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
Don't forget to hug a child today!!!
:w
__________________
SilverTongue: )~<

My webpage in progress!

Join Herps Mailing List!

"If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve man but deteriorate the cat."
Mark Twain
SilverTongue is offline  
Login to remove ads
Old 09-28-02, 08:23 AM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
Join Date: Jul-2002
Location: Ontario Cda
Posts: 3,234
Country:
"3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young."

Amen!!
All points hit home, but as a single mom of 2 teenage daughters, I can really relate to #3
DragnDrop is offline  
Closed Thread

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:05 PM.

Powered by vBulletin®
©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2002-17, Hobby Solutions Inc.

right

SEO by vBSEO 3.1.0