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Old 06-08-04, 06:27 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Hubby vs Iguana: age old one spouse not liking your herps

Background:

4yr old iguana, 4 ft long, with a strong bite.
poops in tub.

Complaintant:
6'1 male.
stated " can we not have one bathroom without lizard stuff in it, including lizards "
response recieved: " ok dear ".

Situation:

Iguana does the "poopy dance".
Iguana is grabbed and headed to the tub.
Tub is filled with herp stuff waiting to be washed.
No room for iguana.
Rush into master bdrm.
The 6'1 complaintant in bathroom shaving.
Statement " sorry the other one is full"
Plop iguana in tub and let her do her job.

Complaintant stomps off

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I had to try soooooo hard to not laff. I found the whole event extremely funny Hubby however did not appreciate it much

No matter what I do, there is no way to include him in my herp keeping. He will not even show a remote interest or anything. All he contributes is b ! tching about how much $ spent on lizard food, will not whack a rat, complains bout the hydro even though I do all I can to minimize that ( taking my UV reptiles outside, which shuts off 2x100W flood bulbs, 2 x 48" UV bulbs 40W ea. , 1 x 20W UV bulb, 1 x 65W flood, and 1 x 18W UV bulb )( that's quite a chunk of savings ), I don't ask him to do anything at all. I spend a good chunk of my day and night tending to the critters ( NO i am not complaining, I love my critters ), and don't ask him to do squat. Sure I'd love the help, but I know he doesn't like em.

It is so frustrating ya know.
I get eyes rolled at me for the amount of time I spend with them, but no offer to help which would decrease the time spent.......
I do things he likes but I don't.

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

done venting.
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Old 06-08-04, 07:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
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gotta prioritize.. someones gott go.. husband has opposible thumbs, he can fend for himself

sorry, just kidding. It is just something that he will have to deal with. herps are a very important aspect of your life, and he should at least understand when the iggy needs to do it's stuff.

I hope you and him get things sorted out. I couldn't imagine having a significant other that didn't share my passion.

good luck
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Old 06-08-04, 07:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Hey Chris, I understand completely,

My girlfriend is the same way, but I got into herps AFTER I met her, and I wouldn't give her up for anything, as she makes me complete...

But so do my herps, as I do need other things that make me happy. She understands that and "puts up with it." That is all that I can really ask. I think that that is enough, as I can't imagine her cleaning a huge pile of boa poop out of a cage with risk of being bitten (there is always SOME chance...)

I would also not like having an iggie poop in my bathtub, so maybe you could have a rubbermaid on hand to throw the junk in the tub in until you get to cleaning it? That way he can have a poop free tub.

Brent

PS I dont know that much about iggies, but why does it poop in the tub?!?! That surprised me!
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Old 06-08-04, 07:21 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Another thing to add, as much as the herps are important, which would be harder to take losing? Think of it as dealing with the iguana dying or else your husband dying... if you would really be disturbed more by the iggie death, which for your sake I hope not, then sadly the marriage is a poor one. Be glad that he puts up with it, as some people probably would not.
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Old 06-08-04, 07:33 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I agree with Brent, why not just give your ig a rubbermaid in her cage so she can do her business there and you can dump it in the toilet. That way you can keep herpin and make hubby happier. As i'm sure you know igs in the tub is not that great an idea considering that they can shed salmonella with their feces. We also have a female iguana that we hatched and raised with our kids and just to be safe that is what we do.

Good luck
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Old 06-08-04, 08:23 PM   #6 (permalink)
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thanks, my iggy is tub trained and the appropriate sized rubbermaid would not fit in her enclosure..... But yah, I need to put more effort into making sure the other tub is empty and using it.......I suppose 1 bathroom is not alot to ask for eh

And no worries on the iggy in tub routine.....I thoroughly disinfect the tub Me thinks anyone would after iggy poo LOL.

Seriously, I love my better half.....just wish he'd make a bit of an effort to try to be interested in some of the same things as me.
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Old 06-08-04, 09:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
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It took a while for my DH to accept my favorite animals, he is not an animal fan by any means. He is happy as long as I'm caring for them, he even got me a new BP for mothers day, it has taken him a long time to come around though. Be patient, and be ready to compromise.
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Old 06-08-04, 09:35 PM   #8 (permalink)
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That's my husband to a T. He complains on occasion, ($$$$$). Sometimes it's frustrating. I love my critters and enjoy them very much. It would be nice if he could share in that with me. He once held some of my snakes and geckos to please me. It looked like he was holding a bomb - lol.

On the other hand, it's nice to have something that is my own. He has hobbies that I'm not interested in. When he complains, I just remind him about money that he has spent on the things he enjoys.

We just do our best to respect eachother. I always talk to him about money that I am going to spend. We also talk about the animal's behaviour, requirements, size etc. I find that if I educate him and make him a part of the decision, he is a lot less resentful in the end.

His famous line, "I am happy to see them at the zoo. Once is enough for me" - LOL!!!
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Old 06-09-04, 04:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I haven't read all the posts (sorry) but I am in a similar situation. My bf isn't very fond of my reptilian pets, especially my 14 foot long burmese python, but he accepts them and me.

He won't offer to help, and always critcizes me for the money and time spent on my 'babies', and he thinks that my pets are just in our lives to annoy him.

He has occassionally shared the interest with me. He once bought a golden gecko and named it Midus (sorry bout the spelling). One birthday he gave me two sweet little anoles. He 'gets' that they are important to me. He just doesn't really see what the big deal is about pets you can't walk, can train and can't really do much with.

Hubby can be pissed; mine knows where the door is =D
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