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I don't tend to read the paper, it's too depressing. My news sources tend to be: www.theregister.co.uk (tech news) www.thisistrue.com (off beat news) www.ssnakess.com (member posted news)
news posted on neo-slither, humour and herp photography mailing lists (see my tag line for links)
It depends where the snake is from...my Mexican and Columbian Boas would read Spanish while my Burmese Pythons would read an Oriental dialect and unfortunatly, my newspapers are all in English...so I am told...my snakes don't talk much...deep thinkers