I"m so sorry. Hang in there it will get better. I still miss my cockapoo. Had her from the time I was 7 till I was almost 19. We had to put her down at 12 years of age and it was one of the hardest things to do. Still miss that little girl! But it will get better.
Herps are like pringles, you can't stop at just one.
'believe me I know!!'