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Old 11-07-03, 01:46 PM   #55 (permalink)
choriona's Avatar
Join Date: Jul-2003
Location: Calgary
Posts: 293
Wow, what a tough situation, compacted by the fact that you are living together. Were you friends first? Are you wanting to keep a friendship? Do you share a room too then? You sound like you helped her out in a confusing time in her life, and you seem like a really caring person. This is a curse I know too well. You get walked on by a lot of people, but then, the ones that really need you are really cared for truly and deeply. What is she to you? Sometimes what helps is to make a list of everything that pisses you off and what makes you love her. Donít confuse love with want. Looking at the things that anger you, see if you are willing to work through that. Show her the list. Let her know exactly what you feel about her at this point. Try to discuss, and donít yell. AND donít involve alcohol. Donít focus on just this one event, look at the whole relationship. Work through all the bugs in one constructive life changing moment. If you two can make it through that, than you can make it through anything. Communication is absolutely essential for equal partnership. Donít tell her you went into her e-mail!!!!!
You may not get over the trust issue, and you may decide not to be together anymore, but al least you will know where you stand with each other.
One thing I have learned is to trust your own instincts. My whole family dislikes my boyfriend, they would like nothing better than to see him get out of my life. But they donít seem to care how incredibly unhappy that would make me. They try to give me advice on our problems, all ending with ďyou should ditch that guy.Ē Iíve just accepted the fact that they donít know me so well anymore. Besides, I want to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend, and not my parents.
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