Originally posted by Tim and Julie B
Alcoholism and smoking are both debilitating addictions. Both are frowned upon by most of the population. I grew up in a household where one parent was an alcoholic, a smoker and a drug user, and the other parent only ever smoked. Neither can beat their addictions. Both affected the way I grew up, equally. When most other parents didn't have these problems, (only 15%of the population has a drinking problem, 48% has a smoking problem), it became enbarassing when one HAD to go out to smoke regardless of whether or not I was reciting my poems, essays, or class works. All the other parents and kids took notice, and I got teased. So do you really think that smoking has no effect on relationships? And why does it matter whether or not we are talking about children or adults? Drugs are drugs no matter who uses them. I would never judge anyone because of their faults, but I have lost many a friend and family member to every drug abuse you can name. Just a little something for you to think about.
First of all, drugs are mind altering substances. Therefore, altho addicting, cigarettes do not qualify as a drug. And second, when did u grow up? Because when I was a kid, most parents smoked, and no one, and I mean no one, was embarrassed that their parents smoked! I work in a school, plenty of parents still smoke. And none of the kids with smoking parents get teased. And third, age matters because if we are talking about a 12 year old kid who is not abiding by his parents rules, then yes, it is going to affect their relationship. If we are talking about a 25 year old who smokes, and the parent is letting it affect their relationship, they are being ridiculous and only hurting themself.
I lost my father 6 years ago. I also had stretches of time when we were not talking. Believe me, it's not worth it. You end up regretting every minute u lost. So if a person can't just "quit", love them and accept them anyway.
By the way, there is a big difference between someone coming home drunk from a bar, and someone coming inside from having a cigarette outside. Again, the mind-altering thing.